Thursday, June 18, 2015

Ipsy unbagging for June 2015



     If this magenta bubble mailer causes excitement when you see it then you are for sure an ipsy subscriber. Every month my stomach gets butterflies the moment I open my mailbox and see this little beauty sitting there. I know amazing things await me. This month I had a new mail lady delivering. I saw her walking down the road with three of these little ladies in her arms. I had to contain my excitement when she handed me mine.

     Now, I don't know about you but I can't stand surprises. At Christmas I often let people know what I got them weeks in advance. My ipsy bags are no exception. They have a way of cheating and finding out what you are getting several days before it arrives. I often take this step and take a look at what's coming. This month was probably the best haul I've gotten so far.

     Lets start with the bag. It's made of this weird material that feels like the inside is lined with foam. I'm personally not the biggest fan of the bag. I've used every other bag so far but this one I don't think I'll be using much. It's slightly smaller than some past ones and doesn't feel as sturdy. I do like that its black with a cute little red zipper. Also the ipsy logo is embossed all over it. Some may disagree with me and find this bag one of their favorites. I probably will give it away the first chance I get.


     Now, the inside has more than made up for the bag. So many amazing items all packed into a tiny bag. This was well worth the $10 price tag.  I received products from Dr. Brandt Skincare, SheaMoisture, BioRepublic Skincare, tre'StiQue, and my absolute favorite Smashbox. Just the lipstick alone costs $10 so I made out like a bandit with this stuff. Let's take a closer look at everything.

     I'm crazy anymore when it comes to my pores. The older I get the more aware of them I become. Were they always that big? Did they appear over night recently? I feel like they had to have otherwise I was extremely unaware of what my face looked like a few years ago. I am constantly trying to rid myself of blackheads that seem to be clogging up every pore on my nose and chin. The closer I get to turning thirty the more I wish I had the skin I had when I was twenty. This product is amazing. It's made by Dr. Brandt Skincare and is called pores no more Vacuum cleaner. I love this stuff. You put a little dab on your problem spots and let it dry. Then just wash it away. The sad thing is that a full size product runs around $45! I'll just have to stick to getting rid of blackheads another way. This product will be saved for emergencies!

     Next we have the BioRepublic Best Sheet Masks. These things run about $4.50 each but looks like can only be purchased in groups of 6. Ipsy was kind enough to send me three different ones to try. I've only tried the cucumber one as it said it was good for pores... and you know how I feel about my pores. It was weird to pull this mask out and put it on. It looked like my skin was melting. It was very cooling and felt nice to have on my face. Afterwords it says to gently rub the excess product into your skin. No need to rinse off. I enjoyed that a lot but it felt like it took an awfully long time for my skin to dry. I also didn't notice any difference it my pore appearance afterwords. Maybe it takes a few times to see any results? At $4.50 a pop I expect something to happen besides my face to look sweaty. I'll probably use the other two and never think about this product ever again.

     I rarely wear lipstick. I have constant dry lips that make lipsticks look disgusting on me. If anyone has some secret to having smooth, beautiful lipstick ready lips, please share it with me. I'll be ever so grateful! No matter how many times I tell ipsy that I don't want lipstick, I still get a new one every month. This bag they sent me Shea Butter Lip Crayon and it is the most gorgeous shade of magenta that I ever did see! It looks hideous on me. HIDEOUS! I envy anyone who this shade looks good on. I'm pretty sure this is my new favorite color. I just want to stare at it all day... This lip crayon is $10 which I feel isn't that bad of a deal. It's a nice product. If they would have sent me a nice coral color I would have enjoyed it much more. I still wouldn't have worn it much though. STOP SENDING ME LIPSTICK!

     I don't usually use shadow crayons. I think that every time I've tried to they end up smudging and creasing. Not sexy. I wasn't that excited for the tre'StiQue shadow crayon. Out of all the colors they could have sent me, they shipped this gold color. I probably would have worn the green that some people got, but I most likely will never even try this color. As most of you may know, I only wear bright colors. Neutrals are just not my thing. I don't look right in them. I may just give this to my sister who looks amazing in neutral shades. I'm sure she'd enjoy it. The full sized version of this is $26. I'd never pay that for a shadow crayon. Maybe for a highly pigmented pot, but not a crayon.

     Last but not least, my favorite product. Who needs camera filters when you have Smashbox Cosmetiic's Photo Finish Foundation Primer? If I were to splurge on any of the products this month, it would be this one. $36 is a small price to pay for this little miracle in a tube. They sent me $9 worth of product and you know I'll be using this for special occasions only. This stuff is the most amazing product. You use it first and then apply your foundation over it making you look like a porcelain goddess! Your pores and lines vanish right before your eyes. I've gone to Sephora just to sample this product in the past. It feels so velvety smooth! I can't rave about this product enough. If they would have only sent me this product I would have been happy. My face is going to look so gorgeous!

     So this month's ipsy bag was well worth it. I'm sure I can find someone to take the two products off my hands that I won't use and maybe trade for something I would enjoy. Even if I don't, the foundation primer and the pores no more vacuum mask have made up for it several times over. I can't wait to see what I get next month! Do you get ipsy? If you don't, you should try it! Click this link and sign up for a month. Already get ipsy? What unique items did you get this month? I'd love to hear below in the comments!



Friday, June 5, 2015

How to make my Red Velvet Cupcakes


     Red velvet cupcakes are my absolute favorite cupcake to make. These have been my most requested ones to make for friends and family and I've even gotten paid to make some for a co-workers birthday party. The coloring on these bad boys is amazing. For a while my hair was the same dark red velvet color. Gorgeous! The chocolate in this is extremely rich and I add another layer of it with the chocolate chips. The cream cheese frosting goes so well with the chocolate. Seriously, it's to die for. 

This is how they turn out with normal cocoa. Lovely!
     Normally I use normal unsweetened cocoa but lately I've just been in love with the dark chocolate version. The coloring will be less red if you use dark chocolate cocoa, so be warned! They will probably come out as more of a red tinged chocolate cupcake if you use dark chocolate. I've also experimented with other colors in the batter. Blue comes out quite lovely. I bet purple would also look just as fine. You can alter them to fit your own personal preference. Some of you may not love red as much as I obviously do. I don't think my hair could get any redder than it is. If it could I would do it. 
     If you try this recipe I would love to hear how it turned out! Be sure to comment down below and post pictures if you got them! I'd love to hear of any tweaks you have made to the recipe as well. I'm always open to suggestions that will make these cupcakes even better than they already are!


Cupcakes
(adapted from a recipe found on White Apples)
  • 
3 1/2 cup cake flour

  • 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa (You can use dark chocolate cocoa if you prefer)
  • 1 1/2 tsp salt
2 cup canola oil

  • 2 1/4 cup granulated sugar

  • 3 large eggs

  • 4 Tbsp (2 oz) red food coloring
  • 1 1/2 tsp vanilla

  • 1 1/4 cup buttermilk

  • 2 tsp baking soda

  • 2 1/2 tsp white vinegar

  • 1 cup dark chocolate chips tossed in flour 

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line cupcake pans with paper liners.

2. Whisk cake flour, cocoa and salt in a bowl.

3. Place oil and sugar in bowl of an electric mixer and beat at medium speed until well-blended. Beat in eggs one at a time. With machine on low, very slowly add red food coloring. Add vanilla. Add flour mixture alternately with buttermilk in two batches. Scrape down bowl and beat just long enough to combine.  Stir in chocolate chips until just combined.

4. Place baking soda in a small dish, stir in vinegar and add to batter with machine running. Beat for 10 seconds.

5. Divide batter cupcake pans, place in oven and bake until a cake tester comes out clean, about 20 minutes. Let cool in pans 20 minutes. Cool completely before frosting.


Cream Cheese Frosting
  • 8 oz cream cheese, room temp

  • 1/2 cup (1 stick) butter room temp

  • 3 cup confectioner’s sugar, sifted

  • 1 tsp pure vanilla extract

1. Place cream cheese and butter in a medium bowl. With an electric mixer, beat until light and fluffy, about 2 minutes. 

2. Add sugar and vanilla. Beat, on low speed to combine. If too soft, chill until slightly stiff, about 10 minutes, before using.


Once the cupcakes are cooled and frosted, I take an extra, unfrosted cupcake, and grate it with a cheese grater over the frosted cupcakes. This makes them pretty and look more presentable. 

I love geocaching.


     I first learned about geocaching about four and a half years ago. A friend of mine was telling me about how he and his father had found over a hundred of these little treasures all over the East coast. I didn't quite understand what the hell he was talking about but I was intrigued enough to check it out for myself. If you don't know what geocaching is, I'll give you a quick rundown. 

     All over the world people hide things for other people to find. Some are tiny like a hollowed out pen. Some are large like a military ammo box. I've seen a wide variety of items used. Some people get pretty creative with it. Inside these caches there is a log. You sign the log when you find it and hide it back where you found it so the next person can find it. The larger caches usually have items in it that people leave behind. The general rule is if you take something you leave something behind. 

     I grabbed my two best friends at the time and we went to the nearest dollar store to load up on tiny treasures to put in the caches we found. I think that was half the fun. After that we found a fair amount of these things. They are literally everywhere. Alls you need is the geocaching app on your phone and it'll show you all the caches you can find in the area. It's usually an overwhelming amount. My favorite geocaches have been the ones that are hidden in wooded areas. I love the outdoors and just being out in nature. One of the caches led us to a stream where we took off our shoes and played in the water. It can be a pretty enjoyable time if you do it with the right people. Much like with anything else in life.

     Recently I decided to introduce my nephew, Ash, to geocaching. He's a seven year old adventurous boy so I thought it would be a very fun time for the both of us. I had already found the geocaches I decided to start him out with. They were ninja turtle themed and easy enough to find for a beginner. Plus I know he gets frustrated easily so I wanted to make sure I knew where they were so I could help him out as much as he needed. I think he enjoyed it a lot. It probably would have been better if it wasn't so humid and buggy out. Oh well. I look forward to Avery being old enough to enjoy geocaching with me. I think it would be fun to just spend the day traveling around seeking out new caches to find together. You never know what you'll come across in your search. At one we found this giant abandoned building which I am still confused as to its purpose. It was pretty ominous looking and sort of creeped me out. 

     Rich and I went geocaching for our second date. He kept getting really close to me to look at my phone despite having the same app on his phone. It was adorable. Since then we've gone a couple more times and always have a great time with it. Recently we decided to try and make our own geocaches to hide. I think hiding your own really adds a new aspect to the game. It'll be fun to see what people think of your cache and the place you hid it. If you haven't tried geocaching yet I highly recommend you download the app on android called C:geo. It's free and so much easier to use than any of the other apps I've downloaded. Have any of you tried geocaching yet? How about hiding them? Let me know in the comments down below! 

     

Thursday, June 4, 2015

The two men in my life.

     For two and a half years it's been mostly just Avery and I. His father and I were "together" for the first year and a half of his life but we rarely saw each other. I've pretty much raised our son without any help from him and let me tell you, it's been exhausting. I don't think I slept the entire first two years of his life. I was the one who was up when he would wake at 3am. I was the person who watched over him when he was up all night with a fever. I'm the one who bathed him, who rocked him to sleep, who has watched The Croods and Finding Nemo more than 30 times each. The two of us have a very close and special bond because of this. That is why I was scared to start dating.

     Dating meant that I would get close to someone and the dynamic of just Avery and I would be changed forever. Would a new guy judge me for co-sleeping with my son? Would he find Avery's weird quirks endearing or would he think there was something wrong with him? I honestly thought that this was something I wouldn't even have to worry about for quite some time. I didn't plan on introducing my kid to anyone until I fell head over heals for the guy. Little did I know that I'd find someone so amazing and perfect for me so quickly.

     I had read several articles on introducing your child to your mate prior to meeting Rich. They all seemed quite ridiculous to me. Most suggested waiting at least a year before your kids met your boyfriend. A year?! So I'm supposed to what, live a double life? What if after that year they meet and absolutely hate each other? I just shrug it off and say I wasted a year? I figured I'd ignore the advice of the "experts" and just wing it. Much like I did with child birth and raising Avery. I'll figure it out as I go.

     It wasn't long after dating Rich that I realized he wasn't like the other guys. He's genuine and thoughtful and extremely sweet. He's pretty much everything I've ever wanted in a partner plus more. So naturally, I wanted him to meet my son. Rich had zero experience with kids so I'm pretty sure he was a bit nervous about it. I know from experience how he must have felt. You don't want your partner's kid to hate you. I had to do it with both my ex-husband and Avery's dad. It was nerve-wracking both times. You never know how it will go, especially with older children.

     The good thing about Avery being only two and a half is that he will easily accept Rich into his life. He won't remember his parents being together and blame this new man for their split. Adding Rich into our tiny little family will make us stronger. He will grow up seeing what a relationship is supposed to be like and never have to see the scars his father left. He won't remember the sadness and pain his mom went through before this point.

     I personally thought that their meeting couldn't have gone better. Avery immediately started talking to Rich like he knew him. He kept saying Rich's name in every sentence he spoke. He wanted to show him all the cool things he could do, like jump and climb.

     Their first and second encounters were brief. I couldn't really tell how it was going with the two of them. They didn't have a whole lot of time to get to know one another so I had to remedy that. I decided a trip to the zoo was in order. Within the first few minutes of picking Rich up my mind was at ease. He talked to Avery and asked what animals he was going to see. When we stopped to get food I left the two of them together while I went to the bathroom. I don't think either knew what to make of the other. When I'd tell Avery to eat he'd ignore me. When Rich would tell him he would comply. I assumed that this was a good thing, for Rich anyway. Avery often thinks it's fun to ignore my requests.

     At the zoo Rich was often down at Avery's level showing him animals and talking to him. I can't speak for all the single moms out there but for me, this was an incredibly sexy thing. He made an effort to get to know my child, something that he really didn't have to do. He offered to push the stroller and was always walking next to me. I'm sure these seem like no brainer things to people in normal healthy relationships but I personally have never had experience with this. I was used to doing everything up until this point. It felt nice to have a partner for once. People walking past wouldn't have questioned our relationship. Rich wasn't shying away and distancing himself from us. He was apart of our little family.

     Even when it's just Rich and I he'll bring up Avery and show a genuine interest in him. He shows that he cares about him because he cares about me. Any worries I may have had before are gone. I loved being just Avery and I for the first two and a half years of his life but after finding Rich, I'm ready to let myself be happy again.


Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Tattoo Fading Tuesday - Week 2


     As of today, I have used the bentonite clay mixture on my finger a total of three times. Tuesdays and Fridays are what I've been shooting for to apply this stuff and so far, I've been pretty good about it. After my third application I've decided to try and do a thinner layer of clay on my finger. I've been applying it kind of thick and I don't think that it ever fully dries because of it. I'm pretty sure it needs to dry to get the full effect so my application of it will be adjusted for future applications. I also think that I'm going to start moisturizing the area afterwords. My finger has been extremely dry feeling ever since I started using the clay and I don't like it. Lets take a look at the progress that has been made so far!


     As you can probably tell from my ever changing skin tone, I haven't used the same lighting in all three pictures making this a bit harder to tell if it's working at all. As far as I can tell it looks pretty much the same. It still seems pretty bright to me and extremely noticeable. The dryness of my finger gives me hope though that it's actually doing something. Perhaps this will take a while to start showing any difference. Only time will tell! Check back next Tuesday to see if any progress has been made!

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Makeup is magical

     I have a love for makeup. Like a huge love. A love that causes me to spend $20+ on a single eyeshadow and not bat an eye. I'd give up eating for a day if it meant I'd be able to afford a new lime green eyeshadow that would look amazing with my hair. It's just how I am. I guess there are worst things out there you could spend your money on... like drugs... or cigarettes. Makeup is much better for my health.

     Today, I'm going to share with you what exactly I do to make my face this lovely. No, I don't just wake up looking this flawless. It takes a small amount of work. I'm kidding, obviously. But in all seriousness it does take a fair amount of products to get the results I enjoy. I tend to switch them out often for others I find. I've fallen in love with a few products that were sent to me from Ipsy. I swear this subscription is one of the best things I've ever signed up for. If you love makeup then I recommend you go and sign up for it. You can find Ipsy here.

     I know most people are afraid of color. I am not one of those people. If my eyeshadow isn't extremely bright than I don't want to wear it. Neutrals are my enemy. You won't find any "nude" shades here. I think that if more people took a chance with bright colors they would find that they are actually acceptable to wear. I personally think the darker the skin tone the prettier it looks, but that's just my opinion.

     At the moment, my favorite palette is BH Cosmetic's "Take me to Brazil". It is GORGEOUS and has such vibrant shades. They are highly pigmented so what you see is what you get. As you can see from the photo, all of these colors are pretty used. A few shades are running dangerously low. I may have to buy a new one soon. Luckily for me, one of these costs a mere $20 and can be found on Amazon. I love it and it's an awesome palette to use if you're just wanting to try a few bright colors. They are just as good as a lot of high-end makeups.

     Okay, on to my routine. I like to start out with a moisturizer to prime my face with. I'm currently using one that was sent to me from Ipsy. It's by Lather and it's their ultra light face lotion. It smells like roses and I heart it so hard. I'm trying not to look at prices of these items because I know they are going to be way too expensive to replace. I'd spend it on an eyeshadow but not a moisturizer. Perhaps I should spend more money on my face though. I'm almost freaking thirty years old. Fucking wrinkles are coming... and I'm scared. But anyways... I'm going to try not to think of such a depressing matter and get back to my makeup. Ahem.  My face is primed and smelling like a flower, now what? Normally I would use a foundation to start out with but today is different.
    
     Today I am using one of the most amazing products I have been sent from Ipsy. It is by it Cosmetics and it's their "Your skin but better CC cream". This cream, I assume, is made from the tears of unicorns and then mixed with the sweat of an angel. It's the best shit I have ever used and I am extremely sad to say that it costs a whopping $38.00 on their website. I almost cried when I saw how much it was because I was instantly addicted the moment I used it. I have freckles from the sun along with redness on my cheeks. A drop of this amazing elixir of the makeup gods and they are airbrushed away as if they never existed. AMAZING.


     Look at this. Flaws are gone. I might as well just stop there. I look amazing already. But I wont. Nope, going to add to the beauty. I use an eyeshadow primer by Nyx on both eyelids. I got this at Target for pretty cheap. Just rub that into each eyelid. This will ensure that you wont get creases in your eyeshadow throughout the day. Nothing worse than thinking you've been looking flawless and then catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and seeing the heartbreaking eyeshadow creases across your masterpiece. UGH! So always prime. You wont regret it!

     Next, I sometimes cover my eye in a white eye pencil. This helps really make your eyeshadow pop. I recommend doing this if you have a darker skin tone. If you're pale you probably have white enough skin to make any shadow look vibrant. I used a NYX jumbo eye pencil in Milk. I got mine from an amazing makeup artist named Lexi whom runs the MadeULook youtube channel. She is amazing and you should check her out. My sister and I got invites to her 1 million subscriber party and got a bag full of goodies. But that's a post for another day.

     After that I cover my lid it a lovely dark lime green. Next I take a bright neon green and go around the lime green color on the outside. After that I take a dark green and go across my crease and down across the lash line making a kind of pointed C shape. Then blend, blend and blend! You want the colors to fade into each other. After that I grab my white on a blending brush and go from the inner corner of my eye and swipe out and over my brow bone. I do this is a sort of swirling motion helping it all blend together.


     After that I take a liquid eyeliner pen and swipe a fine line across the lash line. This helps your eyes pop. I used Physicians Formula. Its thick and I love it. This can be tricky to do if you aren't used to it. I find it easier to keep my eye open as I swipe otherwise my eye does this weird twitching thing and it comes out wonky. I used to be terrified of liquid eyeliner because of how easy it is to make a mistake. I've become a pro with all the practice. I can now apply it even with a two year old running in between my legs. Once you apply the eyeliner I like to apply some to my lower water line with a normal eyeliner. I'm all about the dramatic eye! After that just do a few swipes of mascara and you're done! I personally go another step and use a pressed powder to take away any shininess that the foundation has left behind. I'm not into looking like a greasy faced teenager.

     Now for the before and after. Don't mind the eyebrows. I know they aren't "on fleek" as the teenagers say. They need a proper plucking soon. But anyways... that's the work that goes into this face. Really not that much. It's basically the same for every color. I challenge you to be bold and try a bright color. Let me know how it turns out. I'd love to see!




    








Friday, May 29, 2015

The dreaded single life.

     I never thought when I had my son that I'd ever have to worry about dating later on down the line. You kind of assume that you'll always be with your partner... especially one with whom you've had a child. Most of the time these days that's not the case. I was no exception to this. I found myself single about 10 months ago with a baby whom was still being breastfed. How do you date when your nipples run the chance of leaking? The answer for me was that you don't. I waited for several months with a couple half-assed attempts along the way.

     I only started getting serious with it at the beginning of this year. How does one go about finding potential mates in this day and age? I personally don't get out much. All of my friends live about an hour away so finding a wing woman to go out with was impossible. Besides the fact that they are all happily married or in serious relationships of their own with babies and lives. I was alone in this endeavor. I decided to take my chances with online dating.


     Ahh tinder. Raise your hand if you've tried this app. Now put your hand down if you used this app while in a relationship. Okay, now lower your hand if you used it just to hook up no strings attached.  Hmm looks like that's most of you. Yeah that about sums up tinder. What did I honestly expect though from an app that is based mostly on someones appearance? 
   
     This app made me feel like an asshole. How many nice guys might I have passed on just because they took a bad photo? Then you get a match and hope that they message you first because wouldn't messaging them make you look desperate? I'm just glad random people weren't allowed to message you unless you swiped yes. That can get super overwhelming after a while. 

     With tinder I decided on three guys. Lets call them Bachelor #1, Bachelor #2 and Bachelor #3. Bachelor #1 was a tattoo artist who lived about 45 minutes away. He was almost seven feet tall and seemed nice. We talked for a bit but he was making excuses not to meet me. Red flag here ladies. If the woman is the one trying to meet up and the man doesn't want to there is something wrong. I eventually stopped talking to him because he thought he was the best tattoo artist in the world and because I hadn't gotten mine from him they were crap. Yeah he said my tattoos were all crap. He didn't understand why I'd be offended by this. FYI two of my tattoos were done by an amazing and brilliant lady whose work on my body gets complimented all the time. This guy was a doucher.

     Bachelor #2 I met. I went out with him twice thinking he'd be a good guy. He had a nice job and four (FOUR!) kids all of which he had custody of. He also wrote and illustrated his own horror comic. I went to school for this so it intrigued me. After seeing his work I wasn't exactly impressed but I was willing to look past his lack of actual talent. Divorced single father does not a gentleman make. He was exactly what you think you'd find on tinder. A handsy mother fucker only wanting one thing. Needless to say I told him to piss off after the second date.

     Now on to Bachelor #3. At this point I think I was slightly desperate to have something work out. This guy was a huge dork which I loved. He liked x-men (maybe a little too much. More on that in a minute) and had similar taste in music. He was tall with long, slightly greasy hair that I assume was made that way from the Wolverine hat that he NEVER. TOOK. OFF. When I say never I mean never. He wore it at all times. He wore it to work. He wore it outside of work. He wore it sometimes in bed. I'm pretty sure he thought he was wolverine... minus the muscles... and the claws... and the mutant healing abilities. Okay so I don't see how he would have thought he was Wolverine but he did. He really did. He was also just getting out of a marriage where his wife up and left him without warning. This guy was messed up. Her shit was still everywhere in their apartment like she just ran out to get a gallon of milk. Not really an ideal situation you want from a potential mate. After a month I realized that I was wasting my time and GTFO of there. 

     Okay, so tinder wasn't for me. I needed something with profiles and maybe a matching ability that didn't base everything on looks. I signed up for several sites that catered to a dorky lifestyle. They all either matched you with someone hundreds of miles away or required you to pay in order to talk to anyone. No thanks. I took a small hiatus before I decided to get back in the saddle again.


     Okcupid looked stupid to me. I just assumed it would be just as shitty as tinder. It's name for some reason pissed me off and reminded me of stupid teen dating sites like spin the bottle that I used when I was young. I tried it anyways because I was bored. Plus they had a nice profile section that I could write out all about myself... not that most of those asshats looked at that. Most men just look at your picture and message you. They don't bother to look and see any of my interests. I decided that I wasn't going to talk to anyone who didn't talk nerdy to me within the first few messages. 

     With this I instantly got overwhelmed. I was bombarded by messages from men. It was hard to sort through it all. I decided to talk to a couple and just ignore the rest because it was too much work. This time I thought I'd narrow it down to just two bachelors because three was too much last time. I picked one who messaged me off the bat and seemed interesting. We will call him Bachelor long hair. This is what i referred to him in real life with friends so it seems fitting. The second was the only person on any dating site that I messaged first. Waiting for Mr. right to find me wasn't working out for me. I had to take initiative. I'll call him Bachelor way too sexy for me. Because that was my initial thought. A girl's gotta try, right?

     Bachelor long hair was nice. He had several odd jobs like a mattress inspector. Isn't that on a t-shirt somewhere? I didn't know that was a real job. He also bred rats. Yes, I said rats. His sweetness outweighed his weirdness. I decided to meet him for dinner and a movie. Dinner went well. He was shorter than expected but that's okay. Conversation was easy and there wasn't any awkwardness. We decided to go for a walk before the movie which was nice. We talked and got to know each other. Have I met someone who I could potentially date? Not so fast there, Autumn. We haven't gotten to the movie yet. How can a movie get fucked up you might wonder. Well I'm here to tell you how. 

     Two drunken men hell bent on ruining a movie is not what you want near you on a first date. Unfortunately they sat down right next to me. They called me red. They kept saying crude sexual things to me until I eventually got up and moved. I have a bad temper and didn't want to yell in front of my date. Moving, sadly, didn't help. They cat called to me across the theater until I had to get up and get a manager. Yes me, not my date. He sat idly by. The managers came in with intent on kicking them out until they saw how large they were. They then promptly gave a stern warning and ran out with their tails between their legs. Eventually my date got them kicked out after it wouldn't stop and other patrons were getting bothered as well. We thought all was well until they came back in and spit in my date's face causing a fistfight to ensue. My date was wrestling on the ground with them until the police came. Not a good date. 

     Bachelor way too sexy for me was next. He had dark hair and green eyes and a strong jaw line that would make any straight woman melt. Not only was he knowledgeable in X-men (his favorite being Gambit who just so happened to be my favorite as well) but he had a sense of humor. Educated, funny, attractive, had a nice job, own place, a car, and no past lover baggage to be seen. What the hell was wrong with this guy? Why was he single? It seemed a little too good to be true. He was also slightly hard to read. I couldn't tell if he had any interest in me or was just a polite guy. We said goodbye with a first bump after standing in the restaurant's parking lot for 45 minutes talking after dinner. I didn't expect to hear from that sexy, sexy man ever again. But I did. 

     Date number two was pretty amazing. We went to an arcade and then geocaching. He kept getting closer to me to look at the map. If I was reading his signals correctly then he was actually into me. We went to dinner and then sat in his car talking for a few hours. The ending of the date left me confused again. It was awkward. I just wanted him to kiss me and give me a clear sign that he actually liked me and wasn't just wanting to be my friend. Eventually after several awkward moments of getting in and out of the car, he hugged me. Then he smelled me (ha ha) and kissed me. 

     Bachelor way too sexy for me is now just referred to as my boyfriend. I'm still wondering what could possibly be wrong with him because he just seems a little too perfect but I assume I'll eventually get used to not being disappointed. I'm happy and this is a new concept for me. So I guess if I had to recommend a dating site to use it would be okcupid. I personally think it was a fluke for me to find someone so amazing on there but who knows? Maybe you'll be the exception to the rule as well.


Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Tattoo Fading Tuesday - Week 1

     
     Some couples when they break up are left with invisible scars all over that eventually heal and are never seen again. I unfortunately am not one of those people. When I was eighteen I fell in love and by the time we were twenty we were married. Should I have waited? Absolutely. But it was an experience I wouldn't change. The only thing I might have rethought at that time was permanently inking that relationship on my body. We've been divorced for three years now and I  am reminded of it every time I look at my hand. 


     The funny thing is that he tattooed this onto me but then didn't end up getting it on himself as planned. At least we aren't matching. Tell that to potential future mates. Everyone I've dated since my divorce has seemed put off by it. I wear big chunky rings to cover it up but that just seems to draw more attention to it. I've decided its time to try and fade this bad boy!
     I've done several google searches along with using pinterest and I've decided on a method that doesn't seem painful. It's also one of the few that doesn't say will leave a scar. How well will this work? We will see. 

     The method I'll be trying for the next month is bentonite clay. Bentonite clay is composed of volcanic ash and is supposedly able to produce an "electrical charge" when wet. This "charge" is supposed to help draw out toxins. I've used this before in a facial mask (look for a future pintertest on this) so I've had some experience with how it works. I bought mine on amazon for about $12 for a huge 2 pound container of it. It has so many uses that the huge container of it is well worth getting. I bought the one that has calcium in it. 


What you need:

Lemon juice
A small glass or plastic bowl
a measuring spoon
water

     Make sure not to use any metal when using the clay. Metal I guess neutralizes the ions in the clay which would defeat the entire purpose of using it. Before you start you're going to want to cleanse the tattoo and remove any extra dead skin there may be. I used a facial cleanser that exfoliates. You just need it lightly scrubbed. We don't want the area raw. The Aveeno daily scrub I used is pretty gentle. 


     Next you're going to want to get your small plastic or glass bowl and measure out enough clay to thickly cover the entire area of the tattoo. Since my tattoo is tiny I only used about a quarter of a teaspoon of it. Depending on the size of yours you may need to use more or less. 

     After you get the proper amount of clay you are going to want to add a few drops of lemon juice to it. The lemon juice I guess helps bleach the area. It can be irritating to some people so I'd adjust according to your skin sensitivity. I personally used 3 drops to mine because I know my skin can handle it. It was probably a little too much for the amount of clay I used but I will do anything to get this tattoo off of me. 

     Now you're going to want to add enough water to the mixture to make it sort of a thick soup consistency. You want the clay to be wet, but not so wet that it won't stick to you. If it becomes too thin you can always add more clay or even wait a few minutes. The mixture will thicken the longer it sits and dries. Mine kind of resembled oatmeal. 


     Now, you're going to want to spread it all around your tattoo, making sure to cover it completely. You want it a bit thick to make sure that the tattoo is saturated, but not so thick that it'll take all day to dry. 

     Now just let it dry! Easy peasy lemon squeezy. I timed mine at it took about 40 minutes to dry. Even after that amount of time it was still slightly damp. I probably should have waited another 20 minutes or so but it was starting to crumble. Also my son was growing impatient with me. He was afraid of the clay on my finger and kept getting upset when he'd come near me. I guess when you're two years old this stuff is pretty creepy. 


     After, I wiped off the excess clay with a damp paper towel. As it is clay, depending on how much you used its probably better to do this directly into a garbage can. I wouldn't recommend just washing it off directly into a sink as you run the chances of clogging your drain with the clay. After you have most of the big clumps off just wash the remainder of the clay with some soap and water. 


     And voila! Hmm... looks exactly the same. It does say that this can take a while to see any results. For people with sensitive skin it's recommended that you do this once a week. Since mine showed only miner irritation (I assume from using too much lemon juice) I'm going to try this twice a week. Every Tuesday and Friday is my goal with a weekly update every Tuesday. Let's see a side by side comparison of todays work, shall we?


     Don't get too excited. I'm pretty sure that slight fading is from better lighting. The first picture was taken with a flash. The after was used with a light that I will be using from here on out. We will see what the future holds for this tattoo removal! Check back next Tuesday for an update. Let me know in the comments below if you've tried this method yourself. I'm open to other methods to try later on as well!